just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
All because of that GODDAMNED MIKE PENCE.
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
Oh god it's open bar.
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
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