Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
My neighbor caught me peeing on his rose bushes at 2 in the morning while wearing my Santa hat. My sex appeal has never been higher.
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
Considering we're about to fuck, I really need your girlfriend to stop liking all my Facebook posts.
I was so drunk at your wedding that Uber is now showing up in my Spotify recent searches.
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
Randomize