Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
Things I had in my bed when I woke up: an avocado, a toilet brush, and a note that says thanks but no thanks with the number of taco bell on it. WHAT DID I DRINK?
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
