i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
Things he has used as lube on me: olive oil, cologne, purell, spit, tanning oil, and bottled hotel lotion
He needs to save up for some actual ky before my vagina gets an allergic reaction
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
I shit you not, me and my date were in that bar and within a 10 minute window, 4 ex gf's entered. Every one clocked me and gave me evils. I swear they're conspiring.
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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