I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Who cheats on Christmas eve? It's just asking for Jesus to hate you
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
He wore pink swim trunks on our date and repeatedly insulted my profession, but his cat kept standing up like a person to nuzzle my face and I felt like a Disney Princess. I hate this dude, but the cat is too amazing for me to not fake interest for.
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