Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
Just used my cancer results to get a free lap dance. Great day just got better.
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
I didn't even have time to sit down and the nurse was like: ''You've been having unprotected sex.'' HOW DOES SHE KNOW?!?
I'm using toast as a chaser. If I wasn't already so fucked up this would be revolting.
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
Randomize
