Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
You don't take my phone while I'm passed out, have a three hour conversation on it with Dealer Dave, set up a date with him and NOT TELL HIM THAT HE'S NOT TALKING TO ME.
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
I just came rly close to telling a dude that I want to chew on him and there should be an oil painting of his ass up in the louvre before I realized that isn't how flirting is supposed to go
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
Randomize
