it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
Randomize
