Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i feel like my life is a cheap remake of American Pie
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I dropped her off at home and her fiancé was shitty, it was 4:30 am. I told him I was the Uber driver
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
Randomize