The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
Guess who got arrested for public drunkiness, and called jimmy johns for the entire station last night instead of someone to bail me out? The cop that arrested me drove me home. Win.
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I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
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He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
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