I murdered the dance floor call the cops
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
you know that moment when all the alcohol kicks in and suddenly you realize the bar is very loud and you just want to bite someone sexy and ride their face i am kinda at that moment
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
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