i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
Definitely need to find a less healthy bootycalls. All this bitch got in her fridge is feta, English muffins and wheat grass. What the fuck can I make with that???
Found 2 Coors, problem solved.
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
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