Everything about him screamed your future.
I am getting my wife a tattoo just above her butthole that says, "For entry just add tequila."
So many bounce houses so little time
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
Randomize
