Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(205): View more from Alabama

I only kidnapped one of them. chill

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(407): View more from Florida

i went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passwed out. when you wish upon a star...

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(419): View more from Ohio

It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.

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(336): View more from North Carolina

Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.

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Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
Read it at the TFLN blog
(919): View more from North Carolina

I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011

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(401): View more from Rhode Island

His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old

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(954): View more from Florida

im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls

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(406): View more from Montana

It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.

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(419): View more from Ohio

He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.

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