Texts From Last Night

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  (313): View more from Michigan

  Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that

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  (313): Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that http://tfl.nu/fftq
  Replies (6) Good night (1101) Bad night (2910)
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  (847): View more from Illinois

  dude, osama threatened the US again

  (1-847): View more from Illinois

  dude. i slept with your sister last night

  (847): View more from Illinois

  what?

  (1-847): View more from Illinois

  I saw that as an opertune moment to drop some big news

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  (847): dude, osama threatened the US again (1-847): dude. i slept with your sister last night (847): what? (1-847) I saw that as an opertune moment to drop some big news http://tfl.nu/r4dc
  Replies (26) Good night (5240) Bad night (743)
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  (609): View more from New Jersey

  so after all day drinking, we went to an all u can eat crab place and i was going from table to table surveying the crowd if they though the crab i was carrying around looked like the flying dog from never ending story...what the hell is wrong with me?

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  (609): so after all day drinking, we went to an all u can eat crab place and i was going from table to table surveying the crowd if they though the crab i was carrying around looked like the flying dog from never ending story...what the hell is wrong with me? http://tfl.nu/3dvn
  Replies (18) Good night (3025) Bad night (587)
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  (609): View more from New Jersey

  How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?

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  (609): How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does? http://tfl.nu/dymy
  Replies (46) Good night (662) Bad night (5990)
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  (410): View more from Maryland

  operation have a gay friend backfired

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  (410): operation have a gay friend backfired http://tfl.nu/5i5r
  Replies (35) Good night (863) Bad night (5702)
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  (609): View more from New Jersey

  How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?

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  (609): How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone? http://tfl.nu/ubfa
  Replies (5) Good night (2739) Bad night (1021)
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  (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'

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  (484): I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock' http://tfl.nu/bqqm
  Replies (12) Good night (4743) Bad night (847)
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  (845): View more from New York

  I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.

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  (845): I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again. http://tfl.nu/ku6h
  Replies (15) Good night (3300) Bad night (848)
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  (317): View more from Indiana

  She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean

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  (317): She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean http://tfl.nu/wqi7
  Replies (11) Good night (824) Bad night (4260)
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  (443): View more from Maryland

  You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.

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  (443): You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are. http://tfl.nu/njd0
  Replies (5) Good night (1371) Bad night (463)
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  (714): View more from California

  Having a midget officiate your wedding because you think it'd be hilarious: good idea or potential lawsuit?

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  (714): Having a midget officiate your wedding because you think it'd be hilarious: good idea or potential lawsuit? http://tfl.nu/0nii
  Replies (5) Good night (1103) Bad night (563)
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  (408): View more from California

  Dude, that was like bongs ago.

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  (408): Dude, that was like bongs ago. http://tfl.nu/4e28
  Replies (1) Good night (700) Bad night (274)
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  (937): View more from Ohio

  I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?

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  (937): I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night? http://tfl.nu/ghkw
  Replies (2) Good night (193) Bad night (725)
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  (732): View more from New Jersey

  He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.

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  (732): He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man. http://tfl.nu/spji
  Replies (2) Good night (209) Bad night (363)
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  (919): View more from North Carolina

  I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever

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  (919): I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever http://tfl.nu/et05
  Replies (1) Good night (356) Bad night (748)

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