She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
dude, it should not be this hard to find a bottomless mimosa on a friday morning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saved him in my contacts as "Has 2 kids.. don't drunk text"
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
My friend asked me if I got home okay and I replied "Glad teat. Goodnight." Usually I can translate drunk me, but I'm even lost on that one.
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
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