How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
We are the drunkest people in Toys R' Us right now
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
I tried to think of the best possible thing I could do for my 30th birthday, and the finalist is "get a clit ring"
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
Randomize
