Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
Randomize
