That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
Randomize
