It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
The notification you get from snapchat that someone took a screenie is like a formal declaration of blackmail.
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
