I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
Did you hallucinate the same white buffalo that I did last night.
No, but I did see you shaking hands with a homeless man.
we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
Randomize
