Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
Randomize
