If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
Her directions to the house party: "the north star will guide you, turn left. I'm wearing the potato hat"
Also I feel like 60% of our relationship is based on sausage mcmuffins.
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
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