I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
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She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
Literally the only reason we didnt get arrested was because the cop said I reminded him of Steve Stifler from American Pie
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
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