just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
Clearly you need to take sleeping pills and put your phone in the toilet
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
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