I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
So I'll spare the details, but I think I discovered I'm lactose intolerant. In my sleep. And you'll be needing new sheets.
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
Randomize
