i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
Randomize
