Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
rethinking that breast reduction surgery... i'm tired of drunkenly explaining the scars to guys who don't really give a shit
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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