is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
if i dont get laid while im dressed as Tim Tebow, i'm just staying true to the costume.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Wesley from the Princess Bride. I kept telling him what I wanted him to do and all he would say was "as you wish"
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
Randomize
