You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
I proposed and she said yes man.
You realize the irony of surrendering on independence day, right?
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
Randomize
