I'm pretty hammered, I'll elaborate tomorrow
im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
And you know what the worst part is? Because of him I can now relate to a goddamn Taylor Swift song. FUCK. MY. LIFE.
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
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