I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
Randomize
