Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
What are you doing tonight?
Watching dora the explorer and pining for a sex life.
for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
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