i feel like the song jizz in my pants was made for him.
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
My mom is making me buy a single zucchini, I look like someone who can't afford a dildo
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
When I woke up my bed had been moved to the middle of my living room, a hippie was spooning me on one side and a pile of cocaine on the other, did I go through a time warp or are we still in 2012?
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
Three Decembers later, I'm looking at this fuckin Santa lingerie I bought and just realized my stocking never got stuffed....
Oh, now I remember why I deleted your number. You're kind of a dick. Please delete mine.
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
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