dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
Randomize
