She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
Being engaged is strange. I looked at my cock this morning and said, "we did alright these last 32 years, right?"
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
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