my brain is sober enough to have a conversation.. but my arms feel nice
This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
You're like the fucking Mozart of sexting.
I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
Randomize
