Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
He was drunk at Denny's at 5 am saying how Dear John was the worst movie he has ever seen... eyes filled with tears.
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
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