windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
i think the title to my autobiography shall be, "a bottle of vodka and various pieces of meat"
and this is why you're my favorite gay friend.
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
Did you pee in the oven last night??
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