ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
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