Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (404): View more from Georgia

  Made out with some random "plus sized" young lady. She let me kiss her boobies. It was like I was 6 months old again.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (404): Made out with some random "plus sized" young lady. She let me kiss her boobies. It was like I was 6 months old again. http://tfl.nu/0won
  Replies (20) Good night (2727) Bad night (1158)
• Favorite

  (612): View more from Minnesota

  and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (612): and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling http://tfl.nu/vkmi
  Replies (12) Good night (4279) Bad night (894)
• Favorite

  (785): View more from Kansas

  Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (785): Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless. http://tfl.nu/9j3y
  Replies (83) Good night (9899) Bad night (890)
• Favorite

  (631): View more from New York

  our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (631): our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college http://tfl.nu/4e15
  Replies (17) Good night (7454) Bad night (686)
• Favorite

  (240): View more from Maryland

  She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (240): She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text. http://tfl.nu/g6ne
  Replies (4) Good night (683) Bad night (2250)
• Favorite

  (330): View more from Ohio

  You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (330): You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test. http://tfl.nu/znwq
  Replies (4) Good night (5248) Bad night (1189)
• Favorite

  (949): View more from California

  I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (949): I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled. http://tfl.nu/99xj
  Replies (5) Good night (1549) Bad night (1107)
• Favorite

  (248): View more from Michigan

  My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (248): My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus http://tfl.nu/w26d
  Replies (1) Good night (558) Bad night (918)
• Favorite

  (520): View more from Arizona

  This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (520): This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina. http://tfl.nu/8kic
  Replies (9) Good night (932) Bad night (378)
• Favorite

  (314): View more from Missouri

  So hungover. Have a black eye from where I tried to brush my teeth and stabbed myself in the eye instead. Should make the performance review I was stress drinking about go so much better.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (314): So hungover. Have a black eye from where I tried to brush my teeth and stabbed myself in the eye instead. Should make the performance review I was stress drinking about go so much better. http://tfl.nu/6bjm
  Replies (0) Good night (582) Bad night (503)
• Favorite

  (360): View more from Washington

  I love birth control. How's that for a Facebook status on valentines day.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (360): I love birth control. How's that for a Facebook status on valentines day. http://tfl.nu/9n5p
  Replies (1) Good night (840) Bad night (379)
• Favorite

  (708): View more from Illinois

  I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (708): I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun. http://tfl.nu/pax3
  Replies (1) Good night (313) Bad night (589)
• Favorite

  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (+44): have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important http://tfl.nu/fujo
  Replies (2) Good night (731) Bad night (312)
• Favorite

  (302): View more from Delaware

  Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (302): Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos. http://tfl.nu/r9f5
  Replies (1) Good night (564) Bad night (291)
• Favorite

  (540): View more from Virginia

  I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (540): I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick. http://tfl.nu/8m17
  Replies (7) Good night (358) Bad night (939)

Randomize