the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
Randomize
