Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
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I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
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Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
Randomize