...i apologize for hitting you up so much tonight im just kinda in a little pickle. im going to sleep in my car near u so pretty plz lmk if you head home...
My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
Randomize