i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
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