how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?
accidentally stumbled into a construction site at 3am on the way home. The bulldozer was locked so we had to settle for rerouting traffic with all the orange cones...
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
Randomize
