just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
Met the five year old's gym teacher for next year. He is an old drinking buddy and I used to fuck his older brother. It was like a walk of shame 20 years late.
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
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