all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
So far today I've found 3.5 million dollars in savings. Pretty sure management is gonna start buying me hookers if getting laid has this much payoff
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
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