Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
Randomize
