After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
For 15 minutes straight, he literally did every accent there was, from Russian to Bostonian. The issue: no one could determine whether he was sober, wasted, or anywhere in between
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
i black out too much to be "responsible"
Randomize
