At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
I may or may not have started my period at the bar. Good thing I have dark jeans on.
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
You kept hiding marshmallows in the freezer saying "they would never think to look here"
after he handcuffed me and put me in the back seat, "Mrs. Officer" started playing, I thought maybe this could be my escape
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
So I'll bring my machete and we can smoke your shit.
Out of context, that is a hilariously scary message.
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
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